Genes! Pah!

It’s not in your genes. I promise you, this fitness malarkey is not something you are born with, you didn’t come out the womb with the sweat bands, flexing shouting “I‘ll show you the way to the beach maw“ , it’s an interest, a hobby, a task, job, struggle but it’s not natural. I don’t care who you are or if you train 3 times a day or run 100 miles a week. Fitness is something you picked up, acquired or were pushed into. Everyone always has a starting point.
   I was getting a tad nostalgic today reading through some old report cards from school. As I sat reminiscing on the floor in my grandparents spare room I noticed something I had forgotten. I was god awful at P:E. Some of the reports are vague with a kindly “Always tries hard” or “an able pupil”. Going on to the early years in high school the teachers were less constructive however “maximum effort required” and “struggling to pass practical aspects of the class” was the general consensus. Reading through these is an embarrassing task. But my teachers also comment on my social development? Oh…… yeah they do “One of the quieter members of the class” and of more note “perhaps a little shy to express her opinion”. On the plus side though one of my teachers said my overall school work was SATISFACTORY don’t ya just hate that word? It’s not exactly inspiring, I’d never say that to a client, But I digress….
      All this shows that indeed, we change, we develop. And for me people like me, getting beat in a race by the weird girl called Trisha with a head full of nits and a penchant for wooly jumpers at the school sports day, this is fantastic news. My family are NOT into fitness, or sports in any way but for me it was my gramps when he would put me on his shoulders as he was doing his press ups (I’d love to see him do that now) and because of that small act I formed an interest.

       Some of you may have had to kick start your fitness due to a random person in public calling out “hide yer chips” as you walked past or you noticing as you walked you were making footprints in the concrete. For others it’s work fitness tests, charity events or seeing their favourite actor on the front of Men’s Health. Whatever it is once we start you can’t deny the good feeling it gives you. A natural high (no I’m not talking about the rush you get when you eat a full box of krispie kremes) a high like no other, then you curse it the next day when you are so stiff you struggle to get you butt on the toilet seat. But whatever got you into it, trust me when I say stick it out, don’t phone it in. Oh and don’t let the weird girl with nits beat you in a race!

Off the wagon

Everyone falls off the wagon at some point, and yes, I mean everyone, even me. So I have a blow out every blue moon (sue me)Let me tell you what to do if you find yourself in that situation, I will also explain what not to do. Once upon a time I fell off the wagon with a vengeance. I was actually that bad I woke up to answer the door in the morning to the UPS guy.(delivering health supplements ha ha ha)"Little Miss Fitness?", I force out a grunt and as I stand there I notice my pyjamas back to front. It also occurred to me that I had in fact kept up to date with my food diary by scribbling in a 3yr olds handwriting "Vodka x3, Tia Maria x3, Baileys x3, Wine, Champagne" on the drinks, dinner and snacks columns. There was also some illegible print which I later translated to Chicken, Melon and Cheesecake. So Ladies and Gentlemen, I will give you all this one bit of advice, even though you get in at 5am, totally and utterly trollied, you should still take the time to write in your food diary so you can reflect on your intake over a week. It really does help with the guilt and the shamefulness when you look at that writing and think, those words we have all said to ourselves a thousand times "I am never drinking again". I mean what will my clients think? . . . . . . Especially when I don't even like Tia Maria, Baileys or Melon. But hey! We learn something new every day. The biggest mistake though is when you book a Personal Training client for 8am at Strathclyde park, realising there is not a hope in hell you can drive there, so you run, and when you arrive (if you ever do) the alcohol in your blood stream has heated up to 37 degrees and soaked through your clothes, so now you smell distinctly of a brewery as you saunter green faced up to your client that you have told off a hundred times about the effects of binge drinking on the liver.......Good example Nats, Well done.